Thursday. Today is my last A day here at HRVHS before I go back to fall term at OSU. So not excited about my return because I literally have 0% idea of what I will be doing. Alright, so I know that I'll be teaching, and I've been going over my course load with Mr Schmidt, but that aside, I'm super nervous because I don't know exactly what I will be doing. I suppose I don't need to worry about that right now, but as things have already been so far, I have to be 289% prepared for everything, everything, everything. Hands down, no questions asked.

I'm not looking forward to fall term. Not at all. I'm terrified. I know I will be underestimated at every turn and continuously shut down with everything I do - even when I am 289% prepared. I'm not thick, I know the whole point of programs like these is to psych me out and make me think that I can't do anything at all. It's a combination of mental stress and busy work.

That aside, I am sad to leave HRV. I've really started to get attached to my students here. I remember this happening back when I was working with the students out at Santiam High in Mill City. I love kids. I love working with them. I love watching them progress through their studies.

I love watching my own reaction to students changing. I've walked into classrooms where I've hated a student for a look they continually gave me, but I had to keep in mind that they each have their own background. They all come from somewhere. Life sucks. Especially for high school students. But it shouldn't matter where they come from or how they treat me, I should approach them all in the same, familiar way. I just have to give them all a clean slate from one day to the next to keep myself from forming prejudices for or against them.